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Portsmouth Poll - February 2011

23 Feb 2011

Poll-600

Poll hears two boats - both connected with the London Boat Show - made the headlines recently.
The first approached the Thames Barrier on her way to the show, only to be prevented from passing through because her master hadn’t called the PLA's Thames Barrier Navigational Control (TBNC) to tell them they wanted to pass through and to find out which span to use.
The boat, for some reason, apparently had to wait for some time before being allowed through. Presumably to prove the point.

The second little incident was reported to Poll by a fan who read in the local Dover newspaper that a ‘50ft luxury vessel returning from the London Boat Show needed assistance from Dover’s volunteer RNLI crew on Monday evening, January 17.’
It seems that, due to a fuel problem, both engines on the 50ft luxury vessel had failed off St Margarets. The crew anchored the boat and called the RNLI. But when the Severn Class boat arrived on the scene, the 50ft luxury vessel could go nowhere because with no power, they couldn’t raise the anchor.
And with no tools on board (who ever goes to sea with no tools on board, Poll wonders), they couldn’t even consign the hook and tackle to Davey Jones’ locker.
After the transfer of an RNLI hand with his trusty toolkit in hand, the boat was eventually taken in tow.
Poll wonders if anyone can offer the identities of these unfortunate boats? And should she publish the names?

Following the shooting in January of the American congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords and six local people in Tucson, Arizona, Poll is horrified to hear there has been a 50% increase in local interest in buying guns.
What’s more frightening, says Poll, is that gun dealers are offering – for £88 - a fully working gun for four to 10 year-olds. Apparently ‘My First Rifle’ comes in pink for little girls and black for little boys.

Keith Harding, a yachtsman from Broadstairs in Kent, was forced to abandon his £200,000 yacht Baccus in Force 12 winds some 200 miles off the Sri Lankan coast in the storm that brought the worst ever flooding ever to the island.
   After Mr Harding called Falmouth Coastguard on the satellite telephone, the cargo vessel Maersk Surabaya came alongside and – amid lots of smashing against the side of the vessel - the three crew were winched off one by one.
   Mr Harding later told the press: ‘Baccus to me was like a really good mistress – expensive but she didn't nag.’
   What a lovely epitaph for a boat, says Poll.

A reader sent in a sign to Poll she saw in a second hand shop recently - We Exchange Anything - Bicycles, Washing Machines, etc. Why Not Bring Your Wife Along And Get A Wonderful Bargain?
Any more silly signs out there, asks Poll?

Poll hears the Cheeseheads – aka The Green Bay Packers – regained the Vince Lombardi Trophy after beating the Pittsburgh Steelers 31-25 in Super Bowl XLV in Arlington, Texas.
   But Poll wonders about the scare story run by the Thirty Mile Zone (TMZ) website early in January under the excellent headline of 'Dallas-Fort Worth needs 10,000 more strippers for Super Bowl'.
   John Walsh, who manages the Showtime Cabaret in Kennedale, North Texas, told the TMZ he currently employs 50 dancers but needs as many as 70 more.
   Mr Walsh told the TMZ he is not the only understaffed exotic club in the area. In fact, Mr Walsh said, DFW's 60 or so adult establishments are short a total of 10,000 exotic dancers.
   Arlington city officials said they expect to host 300,000 visitors during Super Bowl weekend (almost as many as the Liverpool Boat Show, says Poll) which puts the tourist-to-stripper ratio at about a hearty 30:1.
   Had Poll known, she could have taken a few of her Pompey girls over for the occasion. She’s always wondered what’s under all that NFL padding…

Poll01-Chmarny-150 In an altogether happy state of mind is Garmin’s Anthony Chmarny, pictured here with one of the lovely young Jamaican dancers luring people to the Digital Yacht stand at the boat show…

Portsmouth Poll - February 2011

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